Mahram (Unmarriageable kin) General Rules
In Islamic Sharia legal terminology, a mahram (Arabic محرم,) is an unmarriageable kin with whom sexual intercourse would be Haraam [forbidden] considered incestuous, and is punishable. Current usage of the term covers a wider range of people and mostly deals with the dress code practice of hijab. [See Hijab Rules]
The plural form of the word in the Arabic language is maharim with long second vowel (Arabic محارم,).
Being mahram is a reciprocal condition. If person A is mahram to person B, then person B is definitely mahram to person A.
Who is mahram?
As a general principle, it is worth remembering that a Mahram is one with whom marriage is permanently unlawful. This is the reason why “Mahram” is translated in English as unmarriageable kin.
This (permanent prohibition of marriage) is established in three ways: By kinship (qarabah), foster relationship (radha’a) and relationship through marriage (sihriyya).
A partial list of what is considered a “mahram” can be found in Surah 4:22 and Surah 24:31, of the Quran.
Q4:22. And marry not those women whom your fathers married, except what hath already happened (of that nature) in the past. Lo! it was ever lewdness and abomination, and an evil way. 23. Forbidden unto you are your mothers (women whom your father has married), and your daughters, and your sisters, and your father’s sisters, and your mother’s sisters, and your brother’s daughters and your sister’s daughters, and your foster mothers, and your foster sisters, and your mothers-in-law, and your stepdaughters who are under your protection (born) of your women unto whom ye have gone in but if ye have not gone in unto them, then it is no sin for you (to marry their daughters) and the wives of your sons who (spring) from your own loins. And (it is forbidden unto you) that ye should have two sisters together, except what hath already happened (of that nature) in the past. Lo! Allah is ever Forgiving, Merciful. 24. And all married women (are forbidden unto you save those (captives) whom your right hands possess. It is a decree of Allah for you. Lawful unto you are all beyond those mentioned, so that ye seek them with your wealth in honest wedlock, not debauchery. And those of whom ye seek content (by marrying them), give unto them their portions as a duty. And there is no sin for you in what ye do by mutual agreement after the duty (hath been done). Lo! Allah is ever Knower, Wise.
Q24:30-31. 30. Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornment save to their own husbands or fathers or husbands fathers, or their sons or their husbands’ sons, or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or sisters sons, or their women, or their slaves, or male attendants who lack vigour, or children who know naught of women’s nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah together, O believers, in order that ye may succeed.
Brief Detailed Introduction:
“A Mahram (for a woman) is he, between whom and her marriage is permanently unlawful, whether this is due to the relationship of lineage/kin (nasab) or because of some other reason, such as foster relationship (radha’a) or relationship by marriage (musaharah).”
“A Mahram is he, with whom marriage is permanently unlawful, either by kinship, foster relationship or relationship by marriage.”
Thus, permanent unlawfulness of marriage is established with the above-mentioned three types of relationships, and a Mahram is he with whom marriage is unlawful permanently. In other words, one becomes a Mahram due to these three types of relationships.
Let us now look at these relationships in detail
1) Relationship of family/lineage (qarabah)
It is permanently unlawful for a man to marry the following (hence he will be considered a Mahram for them):
a) Mother, grandmother, and on up;
b) Paternal grandmother, and on up;
c) Daughters, grand daughters, and on down;
d) All type of sisters (whether full or half),
e) Maternal and paternal aunts,
f) Nieces (brother’s or sister’s daughters),
Allah Most High says:
“Prohibited to you (for marriage) are: Your mothers, daughters, sisters, father’s sisters, mother’s sisters; brother’s daughters, sister’s daughters….” (Surah al-Nisa, 22)
Thus, besides the abovementioned relatives, marriage with others relative will be lawful, thus they will not be considered to be Mahrams, such as cousin brothers, cousin sisters, mother’s sister’s husband, etc.
2) Relationship of fosterage (radha’a)
Whosoever is a Mahram through the relationship of lineage, will also be considered a Mahram by fosterage.
Allah Most High states further along in the same verse mentioned above:
“And (prohibited to you in marriage are) your foster-mothers and foster-sisters.” (Surah al-Nisa, 23)
Sayyiduna Abd Allah ibn Abbas (Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said about Hamza’s daughter: “I am not legally permitted to marry her, as foster relations are treated like blood relations (in marital affairs). She is the daughter of my foster-brother.”
Therefore, the relationships that are unlawful through blood and lineage will also be unlawful through fosterage. As such, a foster-father (foster mother’s husband), foster-brother, foster-uncle, foster-nephew, etc will all be considered to be a woman’s Mahram, and one will be a Mahram to a foster-mother, foster sister, foster niece, etc.
However, one should remember that this is only when breastfeeding takes place in the period designated for it, which is two and a half years (according to Imam Abu Hanifa) and two years (according to Abu Yusuf and Imam Muhammad).
Sayyida A’isha (Allah be pleased with her) reports: “Once the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) entered my house while a man was with me. He said: “O A’isha! Who is this?” I replied: “My foster-brother” He said: “O A’isha! Be careful in determining who your foster-brother is, for suckling is only valid if it takes place in the suckling period”.
One should be careful in determining who is a Mahram through foster relations, for determining this, at times, can be complex and complicated. One must refer to a scholar before coming to a judgment.
3) Relationship of marriage (sihriyya or musahara)
The third relationship with which marriage becomes permanently unlawful and consequently the relationship of being a Mahram (mahramiyya) is established is that of marriage.
There are four types of people with whom marriage becomes unlawful permanently due to the relationship of marriage:
a) One’s wife’s mother (mother in-law), grandmother and on up: Marriage with her becomes unlawful by merely contracting marriage with the daughter, regardless of whether the marriage was consummated or otherwise.
b) One’s wife’s daughter (from a previous marriage), grand-daughter and on down: Marriage with her becomes unlawful (permanently) if the marriage with her mother was consummated.
Allah Most High mentions both these situations in the same verse quoted earlier:
“And (prohibited to you in marriage) are your wives’ mothers; your step-daughters under your guardianship, born of your wives with whom you have had sexual intercourse. There is no prohibition if you have not cohabited.” (Surah al-Nisa, 22)
Also included in the above will be one’s wife’s son’s (stepson’s) daughter, for she is also considered to be a stepdaughter (rabiba).
c) The wife of one’s son, grandson, and on down: This is regardless whether the son consummated the marriage or otherwise. Allah Most High says in the same verse:
“And (prohibited to you in marriage) are (those who have been) wives of your sons proceeding from your loins.” (ibid)
The verse specifically refers to one’s real sons, thus marriage with one’s foster son’s wife will be permissible, if he was to divorce her.
d) One’s stepmother, step grandmother and on up: Meaning those women who have been in the marriage of one’s father or paternal or maternal grandfather.
Allah Most High says:
“And marry not women whom your fathers married, – except what is past: It was shameful and odious.” (Surah al-Nisa, 21)
To sum up, a Mahram is he with whom marriage is permanently unlawful, and this permanent unlawfulness/prohibition of marriage is established in three ways: The relationship of lineage, relationship through fosterage and the relationship through marriage.
In light of the above explanation, your question will have been answered. Nevertheless, If your mother breastfed this nephew of hers when he was a baby (meaning, within the first two or two and a half years of the child’s age), then the rules of fosterage (radha’a) will be applied, in that you and your other sisters will not have to observe Hijab from him when he reaches puberty, neither will marriage be permissible between him and any of your sisters. He will be considered a Mahram to your mother, yourself and all your sisters.
The ruling will be similar if you suckled him when he was young (I am not aware if you are married, thus I am only mentioning one the possibilities, given the fact you state that you looked after him since he was a baby). He will be considered your foster son, thus there will be no Hijab between him and yourself, your sisters and your mother when he reaches puberty.
However, if no breastfeeding took place (neither by your mother or your self) then merely adopting him will not remove the rules of Hijab. If the adoptive mother does not breastfeed the adopted child, then the relationship of fosterage will not be established and the child will be classed as other children with regards to Nikah and Hijab. An adopted child can marry its adoptive parents and their children. Also if a male child is adopted by a woman, she will have to observe Hijab from him after he reaches the age of puberty and visa versa. The adopted child will also (after puberty) observe Hijab with the adoptive parent’s children.
A woman’s opposite-sex mahrams fall into four categories (three categories in the strict-sense definition that does not count one’s spouse). Note that mahrams for a man can be derived in a similar manner.
- Permanent or blood mahrams with whom one is mahram by a blood relationship:
- father, grandfather, great-grandfather and so on;
- brother;
- son, grandson, great-grandson;
- uncle, parents’ uncle, grandparents’ uncle and so on;
- nephew, grandnephew, great-grandnephew and so on;
- In-law mahrams with whom one becomes mahram by marrying someone:
- father-in-law;
- son-in-law;
- stepfather (mother’s husband) if their marriage is consummated;
- stepson (husband’s son) if her marriage is consummated;
- Rada or milk-suckling mahrams with whom you become mahram because of being nursed by the same woman. When a woman acts as a wetnurse (that is, she breast feeds an infant that is not her own child) under certain conditions, she becomes the child’s rada mother and all said about blood mahrams applies here, like rada father/mother, rada sister/brother, rada aunt/uncle and so on. In English these can be referred to as milk brother, milk-mother, etc.
- Being a non-Muslim does not make a person mahram.
Some rules regarding mahrams and ghayr mahrams (non-mahrams)
- Theoretically, a Muslim woman’s mahrams form the group of allowable escorts when she travels.
- An adopted brother (adopted sister) of a woman (man) is ghayr mahram to her (him) and they can marry each other. The term “adopted” means those children who are adopted by one’s parents for the purpose of providing shelter and upbringing and who do not fall under the relationships outlined under the section “Who is Mahram?” above.
- Except for the spouse, being mahram is a permanent condition. That means, for example, a man will remain mahram to his ex-mother-in-law after divorcing her daughter. One is ghayr mahram to one’s ex-spouse.
- One must not stay with a ghayr mahram in seclusion where none of their mahrams is present.
- If wives of a man each become a rada mother of a child, all children and all rada mothers will be mahram to each other.
Rada (fiqh)
Radā or ridā’a is a technical term from Islamic jurisprudence meaning “the suckling which produces the legal impediment to marriage of foster-kinship”. The term derives from the infinitive noun of the Arabic word radi’a or rada’a (“he sucked the breast of his mother”). Often it is translated as “fosterage” or “milk-kinship”.
The concept of radā derives from Islamic and pre-Islamic notions concerning the state of consanguinity created between wet nurse and unrelated nursling — that is, a woman and a baby other than her own — through the act of breastfeeding. Radā also defines the links between various relations and family members of both wet nurse and baby, such that not only are the two forbidden in marriage to one another, but so are their relations in various combination (e.g. the nursling’s biological brother with the milk-mother’s biological daughter). Conversely, the milk-relationship allows usually forbidden familiarities between the two, particularly if the nursling is male and of adult stature, such as viewing the milk-mother unveiled or in private, exactly as if he were a relation.
In Shariah – Islamic law
Radā receives extensive treatment in the Islamic jurisprudence (fiqh) of the classical jurists (faqih). A primary feature of such works is the delineation of which relationships are subject to prohibition once the milk-relationship is established.
Laban al-fahl, “milk of the sire”; as under Islam the wet nurse’s husband is considered the actual owner of her milk (it is his semen which caused the pregnancy that stimulated her lactation), which ties of consanguinity exist between his relations and the nursling.
Adad al-radā al-muharrim, the minimal number of sucklings necessary to establish fosterage is [One Filling Feed]; and the rules are clear, Radā al-kabīr; the maximum age at which the milk-relationship may be established is before one reaches puberty [adulthood]; as the rules of Hijab applies when one reaches puberty; however an infant should only be breast fed up to the age of two by his/her biological mother, further breastfeeding from other related women may be done to extend the milk-relationship of families or due to heath reasons.
One prominent jurist Ibn Hazm [A Quran Psychologist] stated, the bar to marriage was effective only if the nursling was an infant. Yet even these allowed that a new relationship resulted between the two; Ibn Rushd, for example, ruled that the woman could now comport herself more freely in front of the nursed adult male, such as appearing before him unveiled. The UMN Intl Ulama clarifies these views based on the laws of Hijab for women in Surah 24:31, thus such men who have been breastfed whilst being a child would fall under the category of [male attendants who lack vigour i.e. has no sexual desire towards the rada] if the strict relationship of being Mahram is not established then the complete Hijab becomes Fard.
The Ulama-e-Soo [Evil Ulama] are always trying to make the Deen seem complicated when it is easy to understand. Simple and Basic “Understanding” of the Matter clears off any confusion, it is easy to deduct the answer of these matters and one can even do it on a table breakdown to help you understand it better, in the same manner that you can table a family tree.
Related Articles:
1) Nikkah (Marriage) General Rules
2) Talaq (Divorce) General Rules
3) UMN Fatwa: Niqab of Hijab is Fard Obligatory
From the Holy Quran - Surah 3. Al-Imran
102. O ye who believe! Observe your duty to Allah with right observance, and die not save as those who have surrendered (unto Him);
103. And hold fast, all of you together, to the cable of Allah, and do not separate. And remember Allah’s favour unto you: how ye were enemies and He made friendship between your hearts so that ye became as brothers by His grace; and (how) ye were upon the brink of an abyss of fire, and He did save you from it. Thus Allah maketh clear His revelations unto you, that haply ye may be guided,
104. And there may spring from you a nation who invite to goodness, and enjoin right conduct and forbid indecency. Such are they who are successful.
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